The first night is one of the moments awaited by almost every married couple. Although you often feel worried and insecure, you don't need to worry. There are several ways that you and your partner can do to stay comfortable during sex.
Newly married couples are often hesitant, embarrassed, worried, and insecure when faced with the first night. The fear of not being able to satisfy a partner or a body shape that is not ideal is often the cause of a partner being uncomfortable when having sex for the first time.
Various Things New Couples Often Experience on the First Night
The following are some of the questions and things that may cause anxiety as you face your first night:
Will it hurt?
Women who have sexual intercourse for the first time can feel pain in the vagina. This pain is usually caused by the hymen tearing during penetration, which is when the penis enters the vagina. The hymen is a thin layer that covers part or all of the entrance to the vagina.
However, apart from sexual intercourse, this membrane can also be torn due to other causes, such as injury or falls and sports or activities that are too strenuous.
Pain or tenderness is also often caused by feelings of anxiety and worry when having sex. This worry can actually be reduced, if each partner feels comfortable and open to each other.
In order not to get more anxious and be able to have sex on the first night comfortably, try to do it foreplay longer before sexual penetration.
With foreplay If enough, women will be more aroused and the natural lubricating fluid in the vagina is produced more. This can make sexual penetration more comfortable and less painful.
Does not bleeding mean not a virgin?
During sex on the first night, some women may experience vaginal bleeding, but some may not. Whether or not blood comes out of the vagina during intercourse on the first night cannot be a benchmark for whether a woman is a virgin or not.
What if I feel embarrassed?
Worried about body shape that looks not beautiful sometimes makes women hesitate, embarrassed, and even not confident to have sexual intercourse. In fact, this feeling can actually be the main trigger of discomfort and pain during penetration.
Will my partner and I climax?
Many people, both men and women, expect to reach orgasm on the first night. In fact, not all couples can climax at this moment and this is not something to worry about.
In addition to disturbing comfort, the fact is that most women do not reach a climax the first time they have sex. Each partner will be easier to reach orgasm, if they are both comfortable and know what things can make them easy to orgasm.
Therefore, each partner needs their own time to get to know their bodies and what things can make them reach climax.
Should I have sex on the first night?
Actually there is no need to have sex on the first night, especially after the wedding ceremony. In fact, after undergoing the whole day's marriage process, many couples feel very tired and no longer eager to have sex on the first night.
In order to feel comfortable, sexual intercourse must be done in excellent physical and mental condition. Alternatively, you and your partner can sleep in each other's arms in order to still feel intimate with each other.
If you feel tired on the first night, don't hesitate to communicate with your partner and ask for their understanding to postpone sex until you are ready to go through with it.
Various Tips for a Comfortable First Night
So that you and your partner's first night is unforgettable, try to follow some of these tips:
1. Make yourself as comfortable as possible
Comfortable and relaxed are the most important factors in creating a pleasant sexual relationship. Instead of worrying about your body shape or the pain you will feel, try to focus on your happiness with your partner.
Before enjoying sex, create a comfortable atmosphere, for example by playing your favorite soothing music or turning on aromatherapy.
2. Enjoy foreplay
When having sex, do not rush to penetrate. You and your partner can start with foreplay first. Foreplay it can be in the form of kissing and touching on sensitive areas, such as the neck and groin, or with oral sex.
3. Not expecting an orgasm
New couples need more time to get to know each other and learn to satisfy themselves and their partners during sex. So, do not rush to expect an orgasm.
Therefore, to be able to reach orgasm, try to establish good and open communication, respect the wishes of your partner, and don't be afraid to try new things so that you and your partner can achieve sexual pleasure.
4. Avoid fake orgasms
The effect of orgasm is to make physically and mentally better. Unfortunately, some people express themselves as if they have reached orgasm to make their partner happy. In fact, apart from deceiving yourself, you will not get the real benefits of orgasm.
In addition, fake orgasms actually make it more difficult for both parties to find the most comfortable way or position to have sex in order to reach a climax together.
5. Avoid alcoholic drinks
Consumption of alcoholic beverages can make you dizzy and feel uncomfortable. It can also prevent you from fully enjoying intercourse on the first night. In addition, alcoholic beverages can also make you dizzy, nauseous, and not feeling well the next day.
Intimacy is a very personal thing and must be maintained by everyone. Waiting for the right time to have sex on the first night with the right person, without coercion, and consciously and responsibly is one of the greatest forms of self-respect.
If you experience complaints in your intimate organs that might be a problem for having sex on the first night, you should first check with your doctor.