Disputes are commonplace in a marriage. However, if your husband always says rude every time you fight, of course it can hurt your heart and often make things worse. So, how to deal with a husband who likes to say rude?
Domestic violence does not always involve only physical. You need to know that harsh words, insults, and ridicule from your partner can also include domestic violence, you know, but in verbal form.
Tips for Dealing with a Husband who Likes to Say Rude
Whatever the reason, using harsh words at a wife is not justified and is not good behavior for a family leader. If this happens 1-2 times in your household, maybe you can think of it as an oversight.
However, if this happens every time there is a problem, even a minor one, you need to act so that he can change and not repeat his mistakes again.
Here are some tips for dealing with abusive husbands:
1. Stay calm
First of all, understand that most emotional outbursts and harsh words that come out of a person's mouth stem from wounds in the past. So, when he starts to say something rude, try to stay calm and not get emotional or look angry.
Give positive suggestions to your own mind. Look at his anger from another perspective and try to understand what things opened up past wounds and fueled his anger.
2. Don't reply back
Even though you are hurt by what he said, you must be heartened not to reply to his rude words, okay. Swearing back will not solve the problem, it can actually make things worse. It's not impossible that your husband can do physical violence because your words ignite.
In a marriage relationship, there is no win or lose. So, giving up doesn't mean losing. In this situation, you must be able to cool the situation that is heating up by your husband's words.
After all, talking back to someone who is angry is usually useless. Therefore, give in for a while until the husband's anger subsides.
3. Listen and invite discussion
Once his anger has subsided, try to get him to share the reasons for his anger and listen to him with empathy. Repeat what he said as confirmation, so that he really feels heard.
After roughly he can be invited to discuss, start stating your opinion with a cool head. Tell him that what he did was not good and hurt your heart. Remind him that what he does can be imitated by children. However, use gentle words and do not corner him.
If he blames you and you admit your mistake, don't hesitate to apologize to him. You can also kiss or hug him to fix his bad mood.
4. Give time
If all your efforts to listen, have a good discussion, and melt his heart doesn't get rid of his anger and harsh words, it's a good idea to give him some time.
For a long time hearing your husband's harsh words can certainly have a bad impact on your mental health. You may, how come, went away for a while so he could think clearly and realize his mistake.
If he really loves you and your child, and wants to keep your marriage, of course he will try to change into a better person.
There are several reasons why husbands can get angry and speak harshly to their wives. One of them is buried emotional trauma. In addition, high levels of stress and mental health problems, such as depression, can also cause a man to become irritable and speak harshly.
If the tips above have been done but your husband still often says rude when he is angry, invite him to consult a psychologist or psychiatrist so that the root cause of this rude speech habit can be immediately found and overcome.